Happy New Year to each & everyone of you x

Well, it's nearly the end of this year and the start of the next, cant wait. I've got a feeling it's going to be a very happy, healthy and productive year for me & mine, roll on 2012.!!???!!
2011 had many low points for me and my family, along with massive high ones too. There didn't seem to be any middle ground all year. Just as I wanted to give up because things where getting too hard, something good happened and it restored my faith in humanity once again. The low points all involved my baby boy, Christopher, who's 10. It all started before Christmas last year with tests on his congenital heart defect to see if his next heart operation was within sight. Then after Christmas there were more tests on his heart followed with the devastating news that we'd been waiting for for 9 years, he needed more surgery. He was then placed on his surgeons waiting list. On the 13th July 2011, Chris, Millie, Alex, Christopher and myself set off to Alder Hey Children's Hospital at 6am, as Christopher was the first and only surgery case of the day as his operation was going to take roughly 6 hours. We all kissed him off at the theatre doors just before 9am not knowing that for the next 6 weeks he would struggle with one complication after another and we would nearly lose him on a few occasions, bless, the thought of what he went through still haunts me and makes me cry. He went to theatre 6 times in 6 weeks, it was heart wrenching seeing my baby struggling to cling onto life and all I could do was watch. In the end we stayed at Alder Hey for 6 immensely stressful weeks, the only things that got Christopher and myself through was the love and support from our family and friends. I thank you from the bottom of our hearts and I will never forget, you all know who you are. That had to be the lowest time of our lives along with finding out about Christopher's serious heart condition at 32 weeks pregnant all those years ago.    
We go back to Alder Hey for more tests at the end of January and hopefully they will reduce some more of the drugs he's taking. Christopher is doing really well at the moment and getting fitter week by week. He's back at school but not back to doing all his hobbies yet and he still gets very tiered out. It's amazing to think things could have been so different. With all he went through in those six weeks it is a miracle he's pulled through and lives to tell the tale, oh and show off all his war wounds too lol.!!!!
All the high points of 2011 also included all our children. Millie, 15, is steaming ahead with her discus and her first competition of 2012 is in May and it's at the Olympic Village in London, very exiting stuff. Her coach tells us that her current distance puts her 2nd in the country in her category!!!! , amazing since she's only  been doing it less than a year, she now has to train at Wigan Harriers twice a week from January. I'm one very proud Mummy, she's so inspirational.
Then there's our Alex, 14, she's been picked to play and train for the Lancashire Girls Golf Team, she's also astounding her Daddy and me. She now has a lower handicap than her Dad  hahaha, it's a family joke!
I also had more surgery earlier in the year. I had a thigh lift to remove the hanging extra skin I had around my thighs after losing 14 stone in weight. The operation then left me with numerous infections in the scar tissue. I needed to go back to hospital a few times for extra treatment and intravenous antibiotics. On one occasion,  I had to stay in for a week and it was Millie's birthday and I missed it, I was gutted. I hate letting my family down but there was nothing I could do about it as I was very poorly and running a temp of 39.6!!!!
The exciting stuff about 2011 for me involved getting about doing lots of media thingy's and my charity/fundraising work, that will carry on throughout next year, doing even more!!!?  As for the moment, I'm homing in on my fitness and running abilities, as it will soon be April and that's when me and my hunk of hoo, Chris, are competing in the London Marathon for my charity, Ronald McDonald House Charities. So over Christmas I've still kept my running and spinning up, as my goal for January is to drop a stone in weight, run for an hour everyday apart from Saturdays with a 10 - 15 miler every Sunday !!??!! My goal is to run the whole 26.2 miles of the London Marathon without stopping and in under 6 hours- I'm hoping!!??!!??  That's an hour for every week we stayed in Alder Hey with Christopher over the summer.
There's only a few hours to go until 2012, so I'd better start getting ready, as we're taking the kids to the pictures then it's early to bed, then early to raise with an early morning jog on over the tops of Longridge past the Golf Club ?? That should set us up for 2012??. 'HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE' fingers crossed it's a great year for us all. Also, a big thank you to all my chocolate brownie customers, old & new for helping me build my business up over the last 2 years. I had the best Christmas sales to date with some new corporate orders too, i really do appreciate you all. My motto  for the year is - 'KEEP FIT-KEEP HAPPY', you can have your cake & eat it! ♥ Just ♥ x

It's Christmassssssssassssssss!

Well the big day is nearly upon us and i'm getting very, very exited indeedy!!!. I feel really bubbly inside and I keep shouting at my children 'it's Christmasssssssssss' lol. I just love it!
In last weekends Sunday Times, Michael Winner mentioned me and my famous chocolate brownies and raved about them again, bless, he just cant seem to get enough of my brownies. We're still in contact quite regularly with phone calls and e-mails, he likes to catch up on news about the children and how little Christoper is getting on post-op. I think Uncle Winner's a big softy deep down, bless.
I've been totally over indulging this past weekend, we've had 2 Christmas do's to go to and you cant not treat yourself every now and  again, can you!!?? So today I've been to the gym and ran for an hour on the treadmill, in between baking my Christmas brownie orders. It's the last day tomorrow for sending brownies through the post, but I'll still be delivering locally up until Christmas Eve, then we're all off to the Trafford Centre to shop, shop and shop. I just love the Trafford Centre, it's such a top place and has everything under one roof, bonus! We always give our children a Christmas Eve present, just like my Mummy & Daddy use to do. But this year now they're a little older we've decided to give them some money in a stocking and we've called it 'just for fun', so when we go shopping that day they'll have money to treat themselves along with Christmas money from my Mum & Dad. My Millie is already planing to head straight to that shop Holister, the one that's pitch black and you cant see the clothes or prices, kids eh!
It was my hunk of hoo's birthday at the weekend too. I certainly spoilt him lol! He loved all his presents especial the strawberry pavlova I made for him instead of a cake. Top tip- after you've whipped the double cream to fill the pavlova with, add 3 crushed up crunchie bars and mix in, wow it makes such a fabulous addition to the cream, it works so well, then top with strawberries and a crushed Cadbury's flake, so easy!
Well, off to Wigan with Millie now for her discus training with Wigan Harriers. We've just got her Para-Sports fixture list for next year and in May she has a competition at the Olympic Park in London, wow we're very exited. There's a possibility that if she throws very well that day, she might make Team GB for 2012 hahaha, I can't contain myself, more exited than Millie herself, must be my age.  ♥

Christmas is a coming and this bird aint getting fat!

Well just got back from the gym. Done 1 hour 10 minutes on the treadmill and I didn't fall off once, result! I am proper lethal on those things but now that the weather Up North is pretty rank I'm finding the only way I can run is at the gym, I know it's a complete cop out. I am finding it a lot easier than road running though. Anyways April will soon be here and I'm setting my goal for the London Marathon to run the whole 26 miles without stopping, eeeeek! If you knew me you'd understand that I'm no gym freak or a natural athlete, I can take exercise or leave it but I do know it is the way to a healthy lifestyle and it also helps to keep my weight down. I'll always be a re-covering foodaholic after losing 14 stone in weight nearly 2 years ago now. These days I do understand my body and how to maintain my weight/health because believe me it's only half the battle losing the weight, one of the hardest things is keeping it off, that's why so many people regain the weight they lose after 'dieting'. If anyone is reading this and interested in losing weight and getting fit, my advice would be to choice an activity that you enjoy, half an hour 6 times a week, building up to an hour. When I first started losing my weight I would go for a long walk nearly everyday, in fact that was my chosen activity and I lost 10 stone by just walking and cutting down on what I ate. I didn't join a gym or do any other exercise, so it can be done and it doesn't have to cost anything. Get some tunes on your headphones and lose yourself in your music. I've found it's become my escapism and it also helps me mentally with life's day to day problems. It's my 'ME TIME' and now instead of it being a chore I love it and miss it when I cant.

'It's Christmasssssssssss'

well haven't I been lazy lately, hmmmmmmmm maybe too busy to blog more like.
Best early Crimbo pressy we all had was Christopher had a heart M.O.T back at Alder Hey last week and his consultant was really pleased with him, he's off one of his drugs and hopefully early next year they will drop another and then he'll not need to got back to hospital every week, fingers crossed.
Well Great North Run done & dusted, now onto the London Marathon in April 2012. Just got our places through our charity Ronald McDonald House Charities, training has begun, eeeek!
Just finished and sent my first corporate Chocolate Brownie order of the season, I couldn't sleep the night before, but it all went off well. If anyone's interested my website to order from is:-  http://www.browniesbyjustineforrest.com/ they make excellent presents and are also good for a family treat.
Well all the decorations are up in the Forrest Home and the children are starting to get very exited indeedy. We still have one believer among them which is our ickle Christopher who's 10. I think he might know but isn't letting on because he's unsure lol, very funny. He's always asking me Santa related questions, bless!
Today I've just decorated our Christmas cake which looks fab, I've been feeding it with rum since October so I'm hoping it has a kick when we finally eat it, which will probably be around February because there's always so much to eat at Christmas our cake always seems to get left till last, i dont mind because it does look pretty standing on our kitchen top.
I've also been busy between baking brownies, looking after the family and doing a few interesting promotional thingys. One of them is going to be printed in Chat Magazine coming out on 28th December, I have a feature article which I really enjoyed doing.
Well here's to another very busy brownie baking week and I promise I will keep up with my blogs from now on.

Saturday 10th September

Me and Chris are really looking forward to our first half marathon a week on Sunday. Our lovely friends, the Wilkinsons, are having our children for the day, as we'll be setting off early and coming back late. I did a morning spin today, love the Saturday morning ones as I can do most of it still asleep lol.
Christopher looking 'PINK' today, we've never had a pink boy, he's always been quite blue in his complexion because of his heart condition. I sometimes cant stop stirring at his toes as they're so normal in colour now.
Two of his friends, from the estate behind our house, are playing on the xbox with him at the moment. He's only seen a few of his friends since coming home and this kind of thing does him the world of good, as he spends all day everyday with me. He's a very sweet, well mannered boy, just the other night he turned to me and said, 'at Christmas I'm going to spoil you Mum because you've done so much for me lately', arh bless. Then half an hour later when I was giving him his medi's he looked up at me and said, "I could strangle you at times Mum." Cheeky little charmer! I had to laugh though.
oh, oh, oh if you're thinking about sponsoring me, just go to http://www.justgiving.com/JustineForest every penny counts and, it's an amazing charity, we certainly wouldn't have managed without it whilst we where at Alder Hey xxxx

Wednesday 7th September

Had a really bad day yesterday worrying about this blinking drug no one wants to prescribe for my son. To me it's so simple, I cant believe medical professionals would put my sons life at risk. Something really needs to be done, well, that's when I find a spare moment!

Tuesday 6th September

We didn't go jogging this morning, we went tonight at 10pm in the wind and the rain, god that's commitment for you. We did five miles instead of 2/4, yay! Came back soaked, but it will be all worth it. I don't care about times, all I care about is starting the Great North Run and finishing it without stopping, I don't want to walk any of it. http://www.justgiving.com/JustineForest
It's also giving me something else to concentrate on, as I'm having awful problems getting one of Christopher's drugs  prescribed by our family doctor and I'm now thinking about contacting our MP about the situation. It is ridiculous, Christopher consultant wants him on this drug and if he wasnt he would be on oxygen instead, it's a no brainier for me, but our doctor is having none of it and has refused to prescribe it. Now we either have to go all the way back to Alder Hey every time or Christopher's Cardiac Liaison Nurse is going to try to get his cardiac doctor at RPH to prescribe it there instead. That still is not a perfect solution to this very worrying situation. His cardiac nurse describes this drug as a miracle in cardiac cases and more & more children will eventually be on it. I think it's disgraceful other family, some living in difficult circumstances, without transport or the money for petrol will then have to travel miles to get it. Our doctor did say another thing he wasn't happy about was that it wasn't licensed for children, well 70% of the drugs used on cardiac children at Alder Hey aren't licensed as you cant do clinical testing on children. Alder Hey, in fact, have done their own research into this drug and that's why they call it a miracle drug! 

Monday 5th September

Daddy (Chris) & myself were up at 5.30am this morning doing a 4 miler. Training is going well and I'm feeling good doing it , well I sat on my bum eating for 6 weeks while we where in hospital. By teatime, Christopher was feeling a little better. It's so worrying at the moment, when he first went for his surgery, I thought it started and ending with his heart op, I cant believe all these weeks later we're still no further on in our recovery. I'm thinking now that this may take sometime. Maybe Christmas when Christopher's off some of his drugs and he's settled back into his school and his football, we might see the light and this will all be a distant memory, but for now our lives our made up with nursing Christopher, hospital appointments and running. But, after all we've been through, I know we're extremely lucky that we have each other and we're all at home together once again. I love my family! ♥ http://www.justgiving.com/JustineForest

Sunday 4th September

Christopher started being sick last night straight after his medi's, which isn't a good thing to do. He's been off for a few days and seems pretty lifeless and frail at the moment. It's really hard to tell if it's  because of what he's been through or a bug he's picked up. We rang Ward K2 to ask what they thought and they said it sounded like a bug and nothing to do with his recent surgery and if we got even more concerned we should take him to our local A&E. That did put my mind at rest a little.
Alex (our middle daughter who's 13) returned home with a big solid silver cup in her hand. She'd only just gone and won the Preston & District Ladies Charity Golf Cup, whoop whoop. That certainly cheered us all up, even Christopher x

Saturday 3rd September

Christopher was well chuffed, he was on the front page of our local paper and page 3 hahaha. The story covered all of what Christopher has been through in hospital over the last 6 weeks. Lovely story, very moving,even had me in tears and I lived it!!! He's a star and so brave, have no idea where he gets that from??? xxx http://www.longridgenews.co.uk/news/local/brave_10_year_old_s_heart_op_success_1_3727613

Friday 2nd September

Up at 5.30am today, the fear of running a half marathon is stopping me sleeping lol.
Ran 4 miles, feel flipping fantastic now!

Bank Holiday Monday 29th August

Just started our training for the Great North Run. It's a killer, haven't run for 5 months and that was only for a month or two, I only ran at school before that. Me and my huck of hoo, Chris, are doing it for Ronald McDonald House Charities, you can sponsor me through my justgiving/justineforrest page, every penny makes a difference and it's a charity very close to our hearts as we've stopped there on numerous occasions through Christopher's treatment at Alder Hey and it's totally run by charitable donations. It's a wonderful charity and we'll also be running the London Marathon next year as well as other events we're going to be hosting throughout the year. The thought of what Christopher has just been through will get me to the finishing line, i'm so determined to run the 13 miles without stopping.
Started back at the gym this morning. 1 hour spin, that sorted me out lol. Cant sit down now, whoops

Saturday 27th August

We went to Chipping Show today. Christopher still very weak & frail so we took him in his wheelchair. We wouldn't have gone, but I'd been asked to judge the Chocolate Cakes for the WI a year earlier and I just cant resist a good chocolate cake, heaven. What a job, someone has to do it!
We only stayed half an hour and when we got back we all fell a sleep on the couch watching movies, what a lovely afternoon, we must have needed it.

Thursday 25th August

Wow there's no better feeling than clean sheets on your own bed. What a fantastic night's sleep I've had even though I pretty stressed out with all the medication I'm in charge of! It's flipping me out.
I also made time for my first bath in months. I haven't had one since my operation in April.
Christopher got a big fat parcel from a lovely lady who lives in Australia, OMG it's packed with things for him. Christopher is made up, some people are so kind and generous. It makes me very tearful that some lady has shopped for all this lovely stuff and sent it too him, it's really cheered Christopher up and god knows he needs it, bless xx

Wednesday 24th August

Woohoo I'm the happiest woman alive right now! We're being discharged later on today when Christopher's drain comes out and all his medi's are ordered, yeah yeah yeah. Told Chris not to come until teatime because these things can take a while and I'm also not holding my breath, we've been this close to going home about 10 times over the last 6 weeks.
We'll it's half past five and we're on our way home lol xxxx
But first of all we have to get our priorities right. For the last 6 weeks me & Christopher have been planning our first meal at home as a family when he gets home. He's chosen, prawns and seafood, then Ribeye steak, homemade chunky chips and homemade sticky toffee pud and ice cream for afters. We also bought a mountain of chocolate too.
So as soon as we landed home i set straight to work cooking in my lovely kitchen for the first time in 6 weeks, bliss, my kind of heaven lol. Big Chris was amazed at the spread I put on for all of us in an hour. Yes it's certainly a good feeling being home with my lovely family, you cant beat it! Home is definitely where our heart is! xxxxx

Monday 22nd August

A knot is forming in my tummy again. I have everything crossed for my little man today. He needs good news, please good news. Don't think we can take anymore, it's heartbreaking seeing him go through all this. After being Nil By Mouth most of the day, Christopher has finally gone back to theatre. Six times in six weeks is far too much.
christopher is back on the ward finally. The good news is they cleaned his infection out and it looked really good, so they didnt re-attach another suction pump instead they closed it and left a drain in it. Good news because thay can take that drain out on the ward, no need to go back to theatre AGAIN! Woohoo, happy days xx

Saturday 20th August

I really struggled walking into the hospital this morning! I'm feeling really low. When I get to the ward one of the nurses told me she was very shocked when she first saw the suction pump attached to his groin. Christopher then told her his sister thought the collection in the pump looked just like trifle, that made me laugh.
Today went down hill fast when ward round came to see Christopher. They explained that they were going to take Christopher back to theatre on Monday to clean his infection out and then attach another pump to it.
Christopher's not had a good day either, he's really low at the moment, it's just difficult being in here, for so long x

Thursday 18th August

Wow my little boy is a legend! Christopher is sleeping like baby, what a few days/weeks he's had.Christopher is now sleeping his latest surgery off.  I've also had a great nights sleep too. Everything's good in the world!
Everyone has been amazing, we've had messages of love and support from as far as America and Australia. I don't know how I would of survived without fb & Twitter. It's kept us going at a very tough time. I read Christopher all the messages I get, to show him people everywhere are rooting for him and he has to get better for everyone. I've also received messages from my old friend Michael Winner lol oh and two of my director friends. I cant quite believe how Christopher has touched so many peoples hearts.

Wednesday 17th August

After going through more test results, Christopher's consultant has told us that the infection in his groin isnt attached to his artery, my god that's the best news ever.
Christopher is now Nil By Mouth once again as he still has to have the infection removed. His surgeon has also told us that it's a three stage procedure over a few weeks and he'll be fitted with a suction pump thingy thats quite a new thing and it will keep sucking the infection out and also help to heal it. But all this can take sometime and it also means Christopher will also have to go to threatre another 3 times.
At that point I have a total melt down and run off the ward crying. I cant take anymore. It's all bad news for our little boy, all the time. Nothing has gone right. I was so worried yesterday after what they had told us and now it still seems awful for him because it's more surgery AGAIN :(.
Christopher has been so unlucky, to have this many complications. This latest one is very unusual and they've never attached one of these suction pumps onto a groin before.
It's really very hard to keep your head above water and try not to get upset in front of Christopher.
It's nearly 8pm, Christopher hasn't eaten all day and isn't very happy. He's just about to go to theatre. Wish this was all over!

Tuesday 16th August

As it turned out this was the worst day of our lives. Ward round this morning told us we could go home Thursday, as long everything was ok. Good job I didn't hold my breath!
This afternoon we were sent for another scan on the lump in Christopher's groin. He even fell asleep having it done.
We came back to the ward and it went downhill  from there, rapidly.
Once his surgeon had the results they came to talk to me and I was taken out of the room, so I could sense straight away this wasn't going to be good. They told me, Christopher's lump was the size of a golf ball and needed to be removed. They weren't sure it if was filled with puss or fluid. They then went on to explain that this would be done in theatre and because of where it was, it could be attached to one of his main arteries and even in theatre it was a potentially fatal procedure.
I was in total shock, this was the worst thing in the whole 6 weeks that we had to deal with.
How could I go back into Christopher's room in this state?? I was hysterical. Christopher's nurse told me to go and get a coffee and ring Dad up while she stayed by Christopher's bedside.
As I left the front entrance of the hospital and started to dial Chris, as I looked up I could see Chris & my girls walking towards me, smiling. I have never, ever been so pleased to see them in my life. Chris had no idea what I'd been told and when I explained it to him, he couldn't believe what I was saying. Christopher had come so far, this couldn't possibly be happening. Needless to say there wasn't much sleep for everyone that night.

Monday 15th August

Still going to be here a while longer!
Christopher has a few different complications that need sorting out before we're discharged.
We had a surprise visit tonight from big Chris (Daddy), Millie & Alex. It was fantastic to see them and Daddy Chris was very emotional on seeing his little boy and shed a few tears. last time they were here Christopher was very poorly. Very touching visit!

Saturday 13 August

Mixed review today.
Plus side:- The fluid around his lungs hasn't increased, yay. They've upped some of his drug to try to get rid of it. Christopher's off oxygen & morphine and his sats are slowly coming back up.Since going back on Warferin his INR levels have been stable.
Down side:- The DVT in his leg is really painful and he cant stand on it, he's having another scan on it. Yesterdays xray said the infection on his lungs has not improved. He's also got an infection in his groin. The hospitals infectious diseases team are now treating both infections. Chrisopher's now refusing all treatment ie needles, medi's. It took 3 half hours yesterday to get a canuler into his hand. He's got a tummy bug and he's very unhappy. He's got a way to go, I think I'll start to relax around Christmas time. Every time there's a positive there's some negatives just around the corner.

Thurday 11th August

Well we're still here!
Christopher has taken a turn for the worse over the last few days. He's been bed bound for the last four days and is on morphine and oxygen still. Late last night he had an xray and they found he has an infection on his lungs. When I was given the news I thought we where losing him. It's been horrendous watching him go so poorly, so fast. He's had his drains out today. We now need to keep fighting on! We're not giving up yet. This week has been the most worrying of our lives. It's been a very dark time seeing our baby just lying there motionless and in so much pain, it's just been awful.

Tuesday 9th August

Christopher's Nil By Mouth once again! Roll on tonight I we might have some answers. Christopher's in a lot of pain right now.
What another very long day for everyone. Christopher's consultant has just been to talk to us. No good news. His heart pressures are up, so he's now going on some more drugs for that and one of them is Viagra, 4 times a day, eeek. In saying that, they did tell us that before they started used Viagra, Christopher would of had to go home on oxygen and be on it all the time for a few months, so in that respect it's great.They found he still has pockets of fluid around his lungs, so they didn't take any drains out. He's now also got an infection on his groin from where he was put on the by-pass machine. So he's on medi's for that too. Really bad news is he's back on Warferin. He's in and out of consciousnesses and is in a lot of pain. So we're gutted once again! It's getting harder to cheer Christopher up, it's heartbreaking at times, really draining. I had to nip to my hospital appointment at Preston today as well. everything good, my consultant thinks I have a circulation problem with my legs, that's why there so swollen and sore after 4 months. He's put me on his waiting list for a breast lift and skin removal from my arms. Cant wait.

Monday 8th August

Christopher slept till 2pm. That's not a good sign, I start to worry a little. His nurse for the day thinks it might be a combination of all the drugs he's on and reassures me not to worry.
When he eventually wakes, he's in such pain he's shouting out and crying. then he starts turning blue and I start to panic. They give him morphine and put him on oxygen, which he's been on ever since. They say this sometimes happens when the chest drains have been in a while. They start to rub up against your lungs and it can be very painful. This wont get any better until they're removed, so their going to keep him on morphine for now. Gosh it all gave me a fright, I thought something awful was going to happen to him, he was in such pain. Cant wait for tomorrow when he goes back to theatre and we get some answers. They might even remove his drains while he's there.
It's been so hard on all of us. Chris hasn't been back to work yet because every week Christopher has had some kind of surgery and we don't know if we're coming or going. Everyday something happens and it's usually a biggie.

Sunday 7th August

I need some night nurse! The combination of noisy neighbours and stress is keeping me up all night.
When Chris and the girls come to visit, Christopher is very exited and thinks he can manage a short walk. With his drains in a trolley we make our way over to McDonald House for ten minutes.The best 10 minutes of our lives xx

Saturday 6th August

The wonderful Wilkinson family came to visit again today, it's lovely getting visitors and it takes your mind off things for a short time.
I start to cry as Christopher sings Florence & The Machine, you've got the love, to me. Makes everything worth while. I love my ickle man, he's a legend!

Friday 5th August

Poop! We've just been informed that Christopher is second on the surgery list on Tuesday. That will be the fourth time in four weeks that he's having some kind of surgery. It's getting harder and harder every time. They're talking about asking the ward counselor to come and talk to Christopher. He's been through so much, he's now starting to fight everything that's happening.

Thursday 4th August

Well, just complained at Mc House reception, they are lovely and they totally understand. Their going to send someone to tell my neighbours and they've reassured me that they don't tolerate that kind of behavior. Feel really low and crappy all day because I've not had much sleep. It's so hard at times trying to stay cheery and keep your head above water. We miss home so much. Home is definitely where our heart is!

Wednesday 3rd August

Three weeks today the surgeons at Alder Hey Children's hospital (the best hospital in the world) gave our precious son his life back. We're still here as Christopher is making a slow recovery because of all the complications he's had. I'm so glad that we never went home as we were nearly discharged a few times, we would of had to be re-admitted and that would of been awful.
I would like to say I brought a little boy in and I'm going to be taking a man home. Christopher has got a top 5 nurses list and has fallen in love with one of them. No really!
All the doctors, nurses and consultants are really looking after all of us, really well. They sneak cake in for us and three of them have even brought us DVD's in to watch, or maybe that's because they're fed up with hearing Gavin & Stacey! We love all our Alder Hey Angels very much.
Oooops it's happened once again, it looks like Christopher has to go back to theatre for some investigations. They're going to wait until next Tuesday though. They want to see if his chest drains will stop draining first. There still draining massive amounts all the time :(
The other thing that's getting me down is that I'm now living next to the noisy neighbour from 'HELL'. Some people are so selfish, we're all here in the same boat looking after are poorly children, but a few think there on their own and carry on all through the night. First thing in the morning I'm complaining. I so need my sleep at the moment, it's just not funny anymore!

Sunday 30th July

Nothing to report today, which is actually a relief after all the bad news we've had lately.
Alex on the other hand has just rang me to say she's just won the first day of this big golf comp she's in and she played to a handy cap of 10, woohoo. We could do with some good family news.

Friday 29th July

What will today bring, I wonder??!! Christopher had another bad day yesterday. I've been here since 7am and all I can say is my ickle man has a very determined look on his face.
Ooops spoke to soon, ward round just been and it looks like we might be here for some time :(
Christopher's consultant has just been to see us and has said he thinks Christopher has a DVT in his swollen leg, he's on blood thinners and he's also been measured up for Ted stockings. He's just been for his second scan on it, but because it's so swollen they cant pick anything up, so they don't know as to what extent it is.
We look a right pair in our matching Ted stockings, I'm still wearing mine since my operation in April because my legs are still very swollen and sore. There all telling us to move on them but for Christopher it's really painful and he also has to carry his drains with him, you just don't know if you're coming or going, everyone tells you something different.
Daddy made Christopher some pasta to have for tea tonight, he's so fed up with the hospital food, he's not eating much at all. When Daddy and the girls go home, we snuggle up with popcorn and a Christmas movie, who says we cant still have our Friday night movie. Since being in hospital we've watched every Christmas movie going, Christopher has discovered Friends Christmas DVD and he absolutely loves the Gavin & Stacey Christmas special. It's become a bit of a joke on the ward the way all you can hear is the theme tune for Gavin & Stacey, even through the night lol.
Through all the time we've been here I've been truly touched by all the lovely, warm support of all the wonderful people we know. We've had so many messages, cards & presents. Today when Daddy came he brought with him a parcel from home that one of Christopher's very kind friends had dropped off. It was a big bundle of his own WWE wrestlers that he thought Christopher would like, how amazing that a little boy can give away his own toys to cheer up his poorly friend . That's the amazing part of this kind of experience. Thank you everyone, we'll never foget what everyone's done.

Tuesday 26th July

Christopher is still very swollen and is struggling moving around. His consultant has decided to take him back to theatre and put another two chest drains in around his lungs. We're both sat here and Christopher is once again Nil By Mouth! Hopefully this will sort all his problems out and this nightmare might be over soon and we'll be able to go home. After he comes back from theatre we're told that they had drained off just under a litre of fluid from each lung, another massive amount no wonder Christopher is so bloated . I just cant believe that he had nearly 3 litres in his chest, I just knew something was wrong.  As the day goes on and Christopher is feeling more awake he tells me he can breath better, poor little man he's been through so much in such a short period of time. aw bless.

Sunday 24th July

Christopher's very exited today. I've just had a text and our first visitors are on there way. All the lovely Wilkinson Family. It's been great seeing friends for the first time in such a long time. It was especially good because Chris and the girls couldn't visit today and Sundays are such a slow day on a hospital ward.

Saturday 23th July

We're just waiting for some more test results to come back. His consultant thinks he may have some liver damage after everything he's been though. I'm beside myself, it seems nothing is going right.
Then just like that it can all change again. The good news of the day is, because of Christopher's swinging INR levels they've decided to take him off Warferin, whoop whoop. Never have I been so relieved. Have been thinking about Warferin a lot lately and because there's nothing on paper to say its better for him, if this hadn't have happened then we would of fought the hospitals decision, we feel that strongly about it. Christopher and I actually cried like babies when the doctor came to tell us. I feel like a pressure cooker has just been released. This is what I class as a mini miracle!

Thurday 21st July

Christopher is going back to theatre, there's been loads of pa-lava with his bloods etc this morning, so his operation was delayed for a while. Think I've just hit the wall, mentally. It's so hard seeing your baby suffer like this and not be able to help in any way. We've been told that the fluid collection can be one of the complications with this type of surgery and it can re-collect at anytime even when we go home, bummer! They even have to re-admit some children after they go home because of this.
We pick Christopher up from recovery after his surgery and we're told they've only put one drain in around his heart.  It's because when they entered his chest, fluid spurted out all over the theatre floor, so I think they think a lot of it is out now. There was nearly a litre, that's a massive amount, very dangerous amount. They certainly didn't expect that and it's left everyone very shocked. Anyway Christopher is made up he's only had one drain put in. So are we, but I am slightly concerned that they didn't put three in because I've got a funny feeling about this!

Wednesday 20th July

Today started off steady. Christopher is still 'GUTTED' he can no longer play football :(  Gosh, how things can change so quickly! This afternoon Christopher has had another echo and he now has a worrying amount of fluid around his heart & lungs. Just had two consultants checking him over for a DVT in his swollen leg. I'm really upset, they're talking about talking him back to theatre! Yes they've decided, he's going to have more surgery. He's going to have three more drains put into his chest to drain the fluid that's collected around his heart & lungs. If left it could be very dangerous. I knew I shouldn't of got out of bed today! I'm feeling so terrified right now, he's detereated and is quite poorly and very swollen right now. We need this nightmare to be over! Now they've decided Christopher cant go to theatre today as his INR levels are still very high. They've planned it for tomorrow now. He's having a scan on his leg for a DVT at the moment. He's so brave and so upset right now. he's a star, I feel helpless!

Tuesday 19th July

Christopher has put on even more weight today and he looks huge around his waste. I've even had to send out for new underpants for him as the ones we brought with us don't fit him anymore. His right leg is double the size of the other one and he's walking with a limp because it's so painful. Christopher still has a lot of fluid on his lungs, but they assure me that they're keeping an eye on it. Also Christopher's INR levels are sky high. They're meant to be between 2-3 and they're 9.4. Worryingly high I'm told. So his Warferin has been stopped for now. We've been talked through the do's and don'ts of the drug, it's serious stuff and he's on it for life now. The cardiac liaison nurse say's he can't play his beloved football anymore because it's a contact sport and its potentially very dangerous for him now. She's also talked through food and lifestyle changes with us. It all seems very depressing. She's also putting a care plan together for when Christopher goes back to school. We've just been told that some Children's Hospitals in this country don't even use Warferin. so all these changes to Christopher's life don't need to be made if he stays on Aspirin. That makes me so mad and I cant stop thinking about how Christopher's life will change forever. If he needs it, then he needs it and that's different, but when some do and some don't and there isn't any actual evidence that its best, then I'm really unhappy with the hospitals decision to put my baby on Warferin.
Christopher is truly amazing and inspirational. He never moans or cries, he even says thank you to everything, even when someones taking bloods or causing him pain. Everyone who meets him remarks on how well mannered he is. I'm very proud of him, he's a star!

Saturday 16th July

Christopher has had his last drain removed this morning and he's been moved off ICU back to the ward K2. Back on the ward they tell Christopher he's set a new ward record for drain removal after a fontan operation, he's thrilled lol. Christopher has an echo and they pick up that he has fluid on both lungs and his heart. They say they're going to keep an eye on it over the next few days and that the fluid around his heart is only minor. Christopher worryingly has gained 16lb in weight in the last 4 days without eating anything, I'm not that happy, hmmmm starting to worry once again. One of the doctors on the ward keeps annoying me because he keeps saying 'but how accurate do we think Christopher's pre-op weight is'?, very annoying as I'm his Mummy and I can see with my on eyes how swollen and uncomfortable Christopher has become. He looks like the Michelin Man, no joke! The positives of the day are- the Sister off ICU took me aside before we were moved and told me that she thought Christopher looked amazing for a fontan operation and that fontan children are usually sickly, weak looking children and my Christopher looks totally opposite. We're having a great day compliment wise hahaha.

Friday 15th July

Christopher is still on ICU. He's not eating or drinking yet and he's been sick and felt sick all day. He's also swelled up a lot because of his surgery, no one seems to be concerned about it, but he's so big even his fingers have swollen. He's had two of his three drains out today and was a star while it happened. He's now only got one left in. Everyone's amazed because usually the drains are in for at least a week. He's also off some of his drugs. He's still very sleepy and weak though. Chris and the girls have sat with Christopher all afternoon while I went to get some sleep. Our girls are amazing, they're so patient and they're taking all this in their stride, I don't think I would have been this calm and caring at their age. I'm one very proud Mummy x

Thursday 14th July

Christopher's still on ICU, he got taken off the ventilator that morning. Chris and the girls get here early. Christopher eventually opens his eyes for the first time since his surgery. The rest of the day he's in and out of consciousness.  I go back across to Ronald McDonald House to catch a little sleep, as I was up most of the night watching over him. Intensive care is a pretty scary, draining place. It's nothing like what you see on the telly. Later on that day he's causing a little concern because he seems to have an irregular heartbeat and it's effecting his blood pressure. The positives are, I have a pink baby after all these years. I can't stop looking at his feet, they're no longer blue. By the end of another long day, Christopher has removed his oxygen mask twice to say 'Dr Pepper' and ' Chocolate', aw bless.

Wednesday 13th July

D-Day!! Got up at 5am, not that I slept much anyway. Big Chris drove to Alder Hey, with me sat in the back of the car with Christopher and Millie, watching Fred Clause on the DVD player!!!??. We got to the hospital ward just before 7.30am. Christopher's surgeon greeted us, we have a chat then sign the consent forms. We sit around waiting on the ward for about an hour trying to take Christopher's mind off what's going to happen. I cant really explain how I'm feeling, its a mixture of a lot of things, like pure terror, fear, worry, stress and even joy at the thought of our little man having a much better and longer life. He's struggled through the last tens years, living day to day with only half a heart. He needs this surgery before it's too late. This will save his life!
Just before 9am, Christopher is taken to theatre and he chooses his Daddy to go with him into the sleepy room,  I am the most pathetic person when it comes to seeing any of my babies suffer. We've been told the operation will take 6-8 hours. We all go over to Ronald McDonald House, where I'll be staying, to sit out the long wait. It's nearly 3pm and we start thinking my bedroom phone will ring at anytime with news. Nope, still waiting, 5pm comes and goes. By 7pm we're all actually starting to panic. Then at 8.45pm the phone rings and one of Chrisopher's nurses tells us he's out of theatre and we can go to Intensive Care to meet with his surgeons and see Christopher. Phewwwwwwwww, everything up to that point sounded so positive!
We get to the Intensive Care Unit and I just feel something isnt quite right, Christopher's surgeon starts talking us through his operation and throws into the conversation that Christopher gave them a couple of interesting times. Hmmmmm, I thought about that for a second then asked them to explain what they ment. We were then told about some scary times at the start of his operation when they struggled stemming a bleed in Christopher's heart and then they had to make the decision to attache Christopher to the heart & lung by-pass machine through the artery in his groin. Which they don't usually do. We were told he had a rough time and that was why it had taken nearly 11 hours instead of 6-8. While Christopher's comfortable on ICU breathing through a ventilator, I stay with him most of the night and Chris, Millie & Alex travel home. Sometime around midnight I go into shock and can't shake the fear of what might have been. I don't stop crying for the next few hours. Eventually I go over to Ronald McDonald House and try to sleep for a few hours. I'm overwhelmed with grief.

Tuesday 12th July

Have spent the day packing, cooking, baking, cleaning etc etc. It's been good as its taken my mind off, Christopher's operation tomorrow. I've filled the freezer up with healthy home cooked meals and all of my cake tins are packed to full capacity. I've even packed my running stuff in my case, as I'm planning on jogging around Liverpool for my training for the Great North Run in Sept. I'm doing the run in aid of Ronald McDonald House Charities. It's an amazing charity and it's run completely on charitable donations. I have a justgiving page which is under my name Justine Forrest, if anyone out there has any extra pennies they don't know what to do with. Every penny makes such a difference.
Getting back to Christopher's operation, we've been told we may be in hospital for up to 8 weeks, as after Christopher's surgery he'll need chest drains and they can take a while to stop draining, fingers crossed they don't, we have a life to lead. We need to get home lol.When Christopher was first born we stayed at Alder Hey for 9 very long, stressful weeks before he had his first operation and we came home.

Sunday 10th July

It's my birthday today. I'm 41 years young lol. We're off to Southport for the day because, Alex is in a Lancashire Girls Golf comp. I was born in Southport and I love going back to visit. I have really fond childhood memories of the place.
I always love my birthday, but this year I'm feeling a little under pressure to be happy and I'm really struggling! My little boy, Christopher is going into Alder Hey Children's Hospital on Wednesday for another life saving heart operation. We've spent the last 10 years knowing that he would need all these operations etc, but it doesn't make it any easier. I'm now starting to panic and bite everyone's head off at the slightest thing, it's funny how stress can get to you. I wish I could go to bed and wake up at the end of August :( Boo! 

Longridge Field Day was great again this year, mostly to do with how well organised it is. The weather stayed fine too, which is always a bonus. Cath Reid and her helpers did a fantastic job organising and dressing the Field Day Queen and her retinue. It's a lovely day and you get to meet and talk to old friends you don't see all year round. I had a few people again ignoring me and then coming over to say they were sorry but they hadn't recognised me because of all the weight I'd los!!, It never fails to amuse me and even now, over a year on, some people still don't recognise me and it happens quite a lot lol. It's now got us all in the mood for Grimsargh Field Day in a couple of  weeks time.
My legs are starting to heel at long last and I haven't touched any antibiotics in about two weeks now!! I still go to see my surgeon and his team at the dressing clinic every week. Funniest thing was, driving back from the hospital last week, BBC Radio Lancashire rang me on my mobile wanting to talk to me- live on air- about how I lost 14 stone and what it was like for me when I was so much heavier. So I pulled over and talked to them for about 15 minutes on my favorite subject lol.
We're still waiting to hear from Alder Hey Children's Hospital about when Christophers'  next operation is. They did say it would be before the end of June. Some days I cant shake the thought of it off and ideally I would love to bury my head in the sand once again and go to bed and not get up again until mid July, but in real life that's not really an option. I struggle at times thinking about how we'll all cope when the time comes, especially when some days Christopher looks up at me and asks if he's going to make it and if I think he'll die?!?  No doubt when the time comes we'll all pull together as a family and we'll  get through it, like we've always done, with determination and courage. God I love my ickle boy!
On a much lighter  note, our Millie is going to feature in the Longridge News this week, as she's taking the world of para- athletics by storm with a discus lol. No apparently it's true. We take Millie to train every Monday night at Wigan Harriers,  Her coach, Bob, talent spotted Millie at Manchester City Football Clubs disability sports day a few months ago. Anyway, the Paralympics 2016 is a long way off, but she is doing very well and we're very proud parents- once again!!!!xx.

What fabulous weather were having at the moment, I'm topping my tan up nicely.
Well, it's been a very interesting week - not!  Last Friday one of the infections in my leg flared up again, so I went back to hospital to get some more antibiotics for it and they kept me in for five days on intravenous antibiotics instead, bummer! I also had a really high temp at the time, so I know I was in the safest place if anything happened. On the Sunday it was my eldest daughter, Millies, 15th birthday, which I totally missed due to being stuck on hospital ward. Being the most fantastic Mummy that I am (well someone has to say it lol) I had already sorted everything out present wise apart from her new  phone and hightops. Daddy Chris was absolutely amazing whilst I was in hospital and took Millie shopping and got the rest of her presents and spoilt the other two kiddywinks too, so that made me feel much better as I was lying in my hospital bed on a ward with three other burping and f*rting old ladies lol. Millie then went out for a meal and had a sleepover with her friends when I came home and we also took her for a night out in the Trafford Centre so she could spend some of her birthday money. Shes also taking some of her friends to Soccer Six at Burnley Football Club tomorrow, so you could say she was extra spoilt  this birthday through my guilt. But, saying that ,Millie is very special to all of us, shes our first born and taught us so much. I had a real tough time when Millie was born, I struggled coming to terms with all her hospital appointments etc etc and just wanted to be left alone to enjoy my first baby instead of having everyone trying to interfear and tell me how to do everything. Anyway, in the end, Millie had a great birthday and hasn't stopped smiling since, which is what its all about at the end of the day!
All in all I'm feeling much better and stronger everyday. Ive just finished my fifth lot of antibiotics so I'm now a little nervous because after finishing every other course my infections have flared up again, fingers crossed they've all been zapped for good this time! I've had friends ask over the last few weeks if I've regretted having this latest op and I can honestly say a BIG nope to that one lol. Even though I've been very, very unlucky getting these celulitus infections and especially in three places and even though I'm still very swollen in my thighs and I cant yet fit back into my jeans, I can really tell the difference and I can imagine how good they're going to look eventually. I would recommend it to anyone who has lost lots of weight and is left with extra hanging skin, it really is nothing in the big scale of things, believe me.
I'm now looking to the future and working hard to achieve me and my families dreams ♥   

Justine Forrest: Sorry I've not blogged for a while! Well Camping w...

Justine Forrest: Sorry I've not blogged for a while! Well Camping w...: "Sorry I've not blogged for a while! Well Camping went well and all 13 of us enjoyed ourselves immensely. We never stopped laughing all weeke..."

Sorry I've not blogged for a while! Well Camping went well and all 13 of us enjoyed ourselves immensely. We never stopped laughing all weekend, god it did me good. When we got back on the Sunday, Chris took me back to hospital because my leg was playing up and I started to feel a little feverish. They put me straight back on antibiotics and sent me home, but within an hour my right leg had swollen badly and I was feeling very unwell so Chris took me back again to the hospital and they sorted me out with some strong pain relief and I was told I had another infection in my right leg this time. Within the week my leg had settled down and I was feeling much better. It is still leaking fluid and I have to wear a colostomy bag over my leg for the time being. I keep telling myself  'well I put it in and now I'm paying the price'! It is a small price to pay after nearly eating myself to death over many, many years. So going through all this is actually nothing, I'm so happy I lost the weight and now the way I look at it, this is just the final stage in my weight loss process.
Last Wednesday I was asked to do some public speaking for Macmillan, which was a lot of fun. I spoke to a luncheon of about 70 ladies about my achievements and experiences over the last three years. They were a wonderful audience and from that one I've had another two bookings for my public speaking!!!  Brilliant, because its something I love and enjoy doing and I'm so passionate about helping and advising others who want to help themselves and live a healthier life and maybe even lose some weight and feel happier and healthier about themselves. Life can be very strange at times, who would have  thought three years ago, when I started to lose weight, that now I would be speaking to audiences and inspiring others on how to do it and how I achieved it. My motto is 'it's not easy but it's not that  hard either'. I'm a firm believer that, in life, if you want something enough - you can achieve it, I'm living proof!
It's a big weekend  for us this week, as it's our oldest daughters 15th birthday. Millie is so exited, we're a little mad in this family as we really go over the top with birthdays and Christmas's, we love them!!  We're going to shop till we drop on bank holiday Monday and go for something nice to eat to celebrate. Then Millie wants a sleep over in half term and she wants me to make her one of my white chocolate birthday cakes!!. She's then taking three friends to soccer six at Burnley Football Club the following Sunday instead of a party. She's soooooooo exited lol! Millie's a very special girl. She was born with a cleft lip and palate and then at six months old she was diagnosed with cerebral palsy which effects her all the way down the left side of her body. She's so inspirational, everyone who meets her loves her. I credit Millie and her little brother Christopher with my weight lose, as I came to my senses and started to reallise that I had choices with what I was doing to myself, but two of my precious children didn't have choices with there medical conditions. My family are my life and I never want things to get that bad I'm damaging their future ever again. Life is so sweet ♥
   

Well, my recovery after my thigh lift surgery is just over two weeks now and it's going really well. I've had a few hiccups along the way, but nothing serious - I'm happy to report!!  Had a bleed on my side, where they also took some skin away and it didn't stop bleeding for 24 hours. I had it redressed at my doctors surgery and they thought it looked like a pocket of blood that needed to escape, so it was quite normal for that kind of thing to happen. I also went back to my ward last Sunday  when I felt like my left leg was going to explode. One of the doctors took a look at it and thought I had an infection, so they put me on another lot of antibiotics. For a couple of days this week all I could do was sleep, but I must have needed it. I've also started driving again, which is ok.  I had to, because my hunk of hoo, Chris, is working away in London, so I've had no choice. We have had lots of friends offering their services, but I did want to start to get back to normal as soon as possible. I do thank everyone, though, for their wonderful offers, I don't know how we would have managed  without help from our wonderful friends.
I've been asked a lot over the last two weeks whether I really needed the surgery I've had so far or even on occasion whether I thought they, themselves,  would eventually need something like I've had. All  I can say to those questions is 'yes' I do believe I needed it, after losing all the weight I have, it left me with a lot of hanging skin and no matter how hard I exercised , it just wouldn't shrink back. I did it for me, for me to feel good about myself and to give me the confidence back  I've not had for so many years. I used to hide behind sacks of big, baggy, black clothes and I found even after losing the weight I still had to hide certain areas. This is the final chapter in my journey and it's totally worth every minute of it!  You could only really understand if you've been through the same thing yourself or even seen me in the buff lol!?!?! . As for the other question, I don't know if, when other people have lost a lot of weight,  they'll need any surgery, it completely depends on how they then feel about their body and whether there is a lot of empty hanging skin left, I really don't know the answer, all I know is it is right for me. Having had the surgery, I would say it isn't easy and it is something I have brought on myself but I would also say it is the only bad thing about losing the weight, my life in comparison to how it was is absolutely amazing. I am really living for the first time in my life and I love it!
Oh, I have to tell you about my new buys. Well as I've been laid up with nothing much to do, I went on one of my favorite websites, Lakeland. I needed to order some stuff for my cake business so I treated myself to a few new gadgets too. I am a bit of a foodie geek at times so I love anything kitcheny. I bought a pasta machine. I've wanted one for those for years now and we do love our pasta here. It was only really cheap and clamps onto my kitchen island a treat. Soon as it came I made chicken and bacon carbonara, delish! I make the sauce using a tub of creme fresh with grated Parmesan cheese, really simple and easy. I also bought an electric juicer, that was also only about £20. It's very simple and quick to use. All you do is halve your citrus fruits and press them onto the juice extractor and hey presto, jobs a goodun. I make loads of Lemon Snizzle Drizzle Cakes daily, so that should save me loads of time and effort. I also bought some more soup freezer bags, there an excellent invention and very handy to have if you're a bit of a soup freak like myself. I ordered some different sized loose bottomed flan pans too, so I made one large almond tart as soon as they arrived and then cut it into slices when it was cool, looked very pretty when it was all done. Getting that lot delivered really cheered me up. Had to order some new clothes as well, lifes a drag lol. Only because I dont actually fit the usual stuff I wear on my bottom half because of all the swelling on my legs. The other day when I had my bleed I actually ran out of things to wear as the blood was coming through my dressings that fast, I was washing clothes and bedding all day.
Anyway, must get on, the kiddy winks want to snuggle and watch some more episodes of Gavin & Stacey, we went through the entire two series of Faulty Towers last week with them while Chris was away. Well Faulty Towers is very educational you know lol ♥

WOWSAS! My most used word all week, well it saved me swearing in pain!! lol. Well, I made it home in sort of one piece, in fact, even if I do say so  myself, my recovery has been amazing. Three days after my surgery I was discharged, it was on Good Friday, a very Good Friday indeed. I spent a lot of time in hospital being very mad with myself for putting on all that colossal amount of weight in the first place and then needing these operations to remove all the floppy skin that just doesn't shrink back, it's all a slow painful journey at times, but it is all worth it and very necessary for me then to feel like the person I should have always done, one with not just self belief and confidence, but with a life!!! It also stops me revisiting my old life and gaining any weight I have already lost, all the incentives are there because there is 'NO WAY' I'm ever going through any of this again!  A week after surgery, my clips came out too. Now that was a good day, as i had about 100+ staples up and around my private parts going down both legs to my knees and around both hips. That was last Wednesday which turned out to be a very over whelming day for me. I just couldn't stop getting tearful, thinking about how far I've come in three short years. It's pretty amazing and with all the skin removal plastic surgery I've been through, as well as the initial 14 stone weight loss, I achieved all on my own, it just doesn't seem a long enough time to fit  all that in to, but I did and I now cant really remember my life before all this, it has changed in every way.  Anyways, everything getting better day by day, it just takes time, I don't think I'll be running many marathons just yet!
While I was in Hospital, little Christopher had one of his heart appointments at Alder Hey and the outcome is that he's having his next op at the end of June, so just as I get back to normal, another member of the family goes into hospital, typical in our family lol. Christopher also had to go to our family doctor's while i wasn't here because he wasn't feeling well, he had tonsillitus and is now on antibiotics, so is off school. That has been easier to be honest because I cant actually sit in a car to drive  so it means Chris hasn't needed more time off work. Chris and the kids have been wonderful while I've been in hospital, they've managed really, really well. everyones been fed and the house is clean and tidy with all the washing and ironing  done, bliss. All the cakes and meals I left in the freezer and fridge have all gone, so I'm just finishing off all the different soups I froze a few weeks ago. Since coming home Chris has googled a new recipe for tea every night, we've had some great food and thats from a man who usually cant boil water lol. My favorite to date has been a three bean chilli con carne topped with cheesey mashed potatoes. It had lots of cumin in it for extra spice which made it very tasty indeed and one I'll be making in the future.
I've also been kept going while I've been recovering by all the e-mails, texts, messages and cards I've received from family and friends. There all very much appreciated.  I was also contacted over facebook by a lady from Lebanon!?! She had seen my profile picture on facebook, of me before and after, then she had googled me and read my story. She said she had struggled all her life with her weight and now couldn't have a relationship with a man because she had no confidence. It was a shame, I really felt for her. She ended her message asking if i could help her. I hope she can take some of the things I told her and inspire her to make some simple changes to her life that will help her achieve her goals. Two nurses who were also looking after me on the ward wanted advice about weight loss, which just goes to show you, that just because they work with the aftermath of nursing lots of people who need skin removal surgery after weight loss, that still isn't an incentive not to put the weight on in the first place. Seeing the sights they all do on a day to day basis, it would have certainly put me off piling on the pounds.
Another reason why I have to get back to normal fast is that we're going 'Glamping' in a few weeks with the family and a group of our friends. We've done this for the last few years, weather permitting and it's such a laugh. We use to go somewhere overnight, but it's that much fun we've now extended it to a full weekender lol. The Glamping thing is apparently Glamorous camping, well you'd all know that if you watched TOWIE (The Only  Way Is Essex). Not that I watch it, but being in hospital and not being able to sleep much I had the pleasure of watching just about everything on TV lol.
Also, in a few weeks time, I've been invited to a luncheon in aid of the McMillan Cancer Charity at which they've asked  me to speek   about my weight loss journey, winning  Michael Winner's Dinning Stars TV program  and also my forth coming book. What an honor, I feel really privileged to be asked, as everyone at some point in their lives will be touch with cancer, whether it's through someone they know or experiencing it first hand them selves! 
Well, I'm feeling really tired now, so I'll stop my ramblings until the next time ♥

Well, I thought I'd get this done before I start baking my orders. It's another very busy week in the Forrest household, so I don't know if I'll get another chance for a catch up before I go into  hospital next week.
On Friday last week, Millie was awarded a huge easter egg at school for all her achievements. Millie started crying when she had to go up on stage and accept it, all her friends had tears in their eyes and even her class teacher, Mr White ,was  moved in the same way. Millie is absolutely inspirational, she touches everyone that meets her. Millie is one of the reasons I finally came to my senses about my huge weight and then finally did something about it. Two of our children don't have that luxury about their health, but I did. I foolishly and selfishly was eating myself to death like a slow suicide. Not anymore. Millie and Christopher inspired me to choose life and do something about it. I have and I've never looked back!
Just before Christmas, someone I know contacted me to ask me for  help because she said in 2011 she wanted to try for another child with her husband. Again, that touched me and took me back to when I started losing my weight. At that point we, wanted another child and as I was massively obese at that stage it wasn't an option for us, as when you're the size I was it can stop you conceiving and it did. I think, in my case, it was natures way of telling me there was no way I could possibly carry anymore weight around as it would be very dangerous. Straight after Christopher was born we wanted another child. I suppose at the time we felt robbed that Christopher was so poorly and struggling with life and also the fact we spent so much time in hospital, we felt the first few months of Christopher's life were taken away from us and all those precious first new born baby months were gone forever. The lady who wanted advice was moved that I new exactly how she felt because I had been there. She wanted to lose about 5-6 stone and was struggling getting started. I gave her some advice and told her to make some small changes and include as much exercise as she could in to her daily routine. Even 20 minutes walking daily can make such a difference. I lost my first ten stone through choosing walking as my exercise daily, it works, I'm living proof!!! So I'll just have to wait until she can hopefully tell me she's pregnant again, yay!
It's a very exiting week for my Charity, Ronald McDonald House, as it's the" first dig" for the new house in Manchester, on Wednesday. Shameless actress, Rebecca Atkinson and myself will be doing the first turf dig, which I'm looking forward to very much and then we're going to be interviewed by the press and have some photo's taken. I've also been interviewed by the Longridge News and the Lancashire Evening post for their papers this week. I'll be a guest on  John Gillmore's BBC Radio Lancashire show tomorrow (Tuesday) from 3pm. I love Gilly, so that should be fun and I'm taking the children with me, as they've broken up for Easter and they love being included in all these exiting things.
Well, I'd better start baking, these cakes wont bake themselves and my orders are coming in thick and fast at the moment because, from next Monday, I'm going to be off for 10 days recovering from my next excess  skin removal operation!!!! The only down side from losing such a vast amount of weight!!(But I'm hoping to feel the benefits in my running!!
Oh, a note to self:- When I make chicken and veg soup for the freezer, I should freeze immediately as it's far to good . Suffice  to say, it got all eaten within a day or two and there ' s none to freeze!! Next on my freezer list are cheese and onion pies and our old family favorite healthy chillie con carne, which I will freeze as soon as they have cooled down. I must buy some more soup freezer bags, they are a must have and so handy.  X

Well what a very busy day I've had. Millie, Alex and myself have all had appointments, so I've been running around like a headless chicken today lol. The big news of the week is that, today, Christopher went on the surgery list at Alder Hey Children's Hospital for his next heart surgery which they inform us will be in a month or two, eeeeek. Christopher's very cool about it all and exited at the prospect of not being able to go to school for at least a month and being able to play on his xbox all day. God love him, bless. While we where there we visited Ronald McDonald House again and they told us, up to now, we've raised nearly £4000 in Christopher's name, so that was nice to know.
Next week I'm going to my first official outing on behalf of Ronald McDonald House Charities, I've been invited to dig the first turf for their new Manchester house build, so I'm very exited. All the press releases have gone out and the Longridge News are doing a piece on it for their paper next week too. I'll also be taking lots of my cakes with me for all the builders on site lol.
I've had the paperwork through for my next op which is on 19th April, fingers crossed. No I'm pretty sure this time it will go ahead. I went for my pre-op at RPH this morning, the nurse doing all my tests recognised me from the telly, it was very funny when the penny dropped and she said meeting me had made her day as she loved the show, aw. I still cant believe I still get recognised as it's been over a year since I was last on the telly and, since the show was filmed, I've lost a further 4 stone in weight.
Last week someone from the area I live in, that I vaguely know, contacted me wanting advice on losing weight as in her words she's become too embarrassed  to leave her house in case anyone sees her. Her e-mail had me in tears and sent me straight back in time to my old life. Everything she wrote, I once felt, it was like reading my life. I felt very moved by her predicament and very touched that she wanted to share it with me and ask for advice. I sent her an e-mail back giving her some tips and things to think about, only time will tell if anything I said helped. I do wish her luck, it's not easy but its not that hard either, I know I've been there.
Well I'm going to start stocking the freezer up for all the family while I'm in hospital ,starting from tomorrow. The first thing I'm going to make batches of is my very healthy chicken and vegetable soup which will have me up and back on my feet after my op in no time. I roasted two large chickens in the oven yesterday for tea, so I'll be using some of the leftover chicken and all the stock and juices that came from them as a base for my delicious soup, it's making me hungry just thinking about it.

Well the sun has definitely had it's hat on this week up North. It's just like summer. Had all my washing out on the line all week and I'm dying to get all my summer clothes out too, but I think that might be tempting fate a little lol.
Every week I get quite a few people e-mailing, texting, ringing me or just knocking on my door with messages or questions about my weight loss. This week I was moved once again by a chef I know telling me that, because of our conversation two weeks earlier, she had made the decision to join a gym and change her life style to a more healthier one. She told me the defining moment came for her when she told me she was going to join a slimming club and I had told her, ' it's you that loses the weight and you wanting too, not the slimming club, you!'. She went away and thought about it and instead of spending her money every week on a slimming club membership she has used it to join a gym instead. I went on to ask her if her gym was full of the people she imagined went to gyms, she said she was very shocked to see everyone was normal and they were all different shapes and sizes and no one looked at you!!!! Just what I had tried to reassure her two weeks previously. She, like I, was put off going to a gym because we thought it would be full of fit people in hardly any clothes. She went on to say, this time it was going to be different for her. After listening to me and taking on board what I had told her, she felt she could really do this and that I had been her inspiration! I was again really proud that my knowledge and experience had helped someone else.
It wasn't really third time lucky for me this week, as I had imaged it being. I had my next operation cancelled for the third time this year and we're only in March, boo. I was supposed to be going into hospital next week for a thigh and bottom lift, as you'll know I've lost 14 stone in weight, which has left me with some hanging skin in places. Last June I had excess skin removed from my stomach and next weeks op was supposed to be my second operation with two more skin removal operations to follow. Apparently there's been a mix up at the hospital and I wasn't on the operating list for next week, which is deeply disappointing after arranging our lives around it and then the recovering time afterwards. I've had so much to do in preparation for this operation, not just with organizing our families life around it, but mentally getting into the right frame of mind, as its a big thing to put yourself through mentally and physically. Its definitely not a vain thing I'm undertaking, I'm having these operations done to finally be able to put the past behind me and move on for good. The amount of skin I'm having removed will make such a difference to everyday life for me. I'll no longer have to strap up my excess skin every morning before I get dressed and I'm really looking forward to feeling the difference when I run, as my training is going really well at the moment. But I think everything is for a reason and I'm trying to stay positive about the cancellation. On the plus side, I definitely wont be in hospital for Mother's Day, which I love because the family spoil me for the day and thats what Mother's Day is all about. Also we've been invited to a friends 40th birthday bash, which we thought we couldn't make and I've been asked to attend a ground breaking ceremony in Manchester for the new Ronald McDonald House they're going to be building there.
I had a meeting this week with the charity I'll be running for in the Great North Run 2011 and London Marathon 2012. They got in touch with me and asked to meet with me and talk through some fundraising ideas they thought I might be interested in supporting. It's an absolute dream for me to be involved, as our family has used Ronald McDonald House at Alder Hey Hospital in the past and the facilities there are incredible. It's truly an amazing place, it's a home from home at the most incredibly stressful time in your families life and it really does make such a difference to what you're going through. The ground dig is the first event I'll be going to and thats on 13th April. We went to the ground break for the extension at the Ronald McDonald House at Alder Hey 9 years ago with Christopher, when Ricky Tomlinson was doing the first dig on site. Christopher and Ricky where featured in all the press things about it. How weird is that, 9 years later they have asked me to attend in a totally different capacity.
We did 10 miles first thing Saturday morning. It was pretty hard going and when I've run since my legs have felt really heavy. Hey ho, we're going to do another long one this Sunday. In the next month I want to be able to complete 13 miles, so we'll know for sure that we can run that distance. Cant really believe it myself, only 6 weeks ago I couldn't run for 10 yards without stopping and we actually started training to 2 miles, which I found incredibly hard going. Now we go out 3 times a week and do 5-6 miles each time.
We'll it's Friday and that only means one thing in the Forrest house, movie and home-made take-a-way night. If that makes any sense, I actually make a healthier option take-a-way meal ie pizza, curry, burgers, something along those lines. So tonight it's 'Pizza night', Christopher's chosen this weeks menu. So the pizza dough is in the bread making machine as we speak and my home-made Summer Pudding is setting in the fridge. We just love Summer Pud, all that fresh fruit and it's so good for you. I use brioche instead of normal white bread. It makes all the difference. Just got to make the coleslaw and a big bowl of salad, yummy. Christopher has also chosen this weeks film which is the Elephant Man. I bought this film years ago for us all to watch together. I loved this film when I first watched it in the 80's, I found it so inspirational with a strong message that nothing in life is perfect and there's always someone worse off than you. Millie, our oldest daughter, was born with a cleft lip and palate and she also has cerebral palsy, so the messages in this film actually touch on our lives. I love watching films like this with our children, it sends out such a good positive message.

Well it's Blog time once again! What a good week we've had. My runnings going really well.Me and Chris  ran 7 miles first thing Sunday morning!!!!!  UNBELIEVABLE!!  Well, we thought so!!
Millie, our first born who's nearly 15, has been talent spotted in Disability Athletics for the shot put. So all day Saturday we were at Sportcity, next to  Manchester City Football Club, supporting her while she attended a training day. At the end of the day, Millie was approached by a coach from Wigan Harriers to train with them every week, as they think she's got  real potential and  she could go far in the world of disability sports!!! We're all really thrilled for Millie, as she's sports mad, but is very limited  to what she can manage , due to her cerebral palsy.
Our middle daughter, Alex, had an  eye test this week and needs glasses, it turns out shes short sighted just like her Daddy. God she looks so cute in her new specs lol. She's not so keen, so I keep reassuring her that she looks beautiful in them, aw.
Christopher, our little boy, had another appointment at Alder Hey Children's Hospital in Liverpool. It was for a fitness test on a treadmill, to see how fit/unfit he actually is, according to his age group. He's going to be having more heart surgery at some point, so these test's are to help map everything out.
I'll be running the GNR and the London Marathon with my husband Chris, so even though training is hard at times, we've got each other to push each other on and keep each other company which is lovely. And someone to shout at on a tough day!!??!!   I've been going through and typing up all my hand written recipes this week, which is a job and a half, as some are very well worn and sticky lol. Lots of them are very tasty and healthy and have helped me immensely through my weight loss. So watch this space, hopefully at some point, they'll all be featured in my book when its published!!!

Well I've managed it, yay! Doing this blog thingy has taken me sometime, I can tell you! There's never enough time in the day for these things and I seem to spend my life playing 'catch up', anyway. Leading this busy life that I do, after spending years being under active because I was morbidly obese, is fantastic and I wouldn't have it any other way now.
Well it's four weeks into my Great North Run (half Marathon) training and finally I'm getting it, yay! My running has now become a lot easier and I'm now doing five miles a day, five days a week. Trying to also be very good with what I'm eating, as I find there's nothing worse than running when you've eaten a poor diet that day. My book is also coming along nicely and I'm really enjoying writing it. It's been a very emotional journey for me, at times, but all in a good way. After losing 14 stone in weight recently, my book has helped me immensely to leave the past behind and make me even more determined never to return to my 'OLD' bad habits and ways.